...or else tomorrow, while leaving for work, you won’t pay attention to where you’re walking and step into an enormous pile of dog shit. While this is totally gross by itself, the situation will only be made worse when you realize that the dog whose poop you're standing in is none other than three-headed Cerberus, foul offspring of Echidna and Typhon and fearsome guardian to the Gates of Hades themselves. This means that in addition to ruining your shoes, you’ll also be transported to the fiery bowels of the Greek underworld. There, you’ll spend eternity being force-fed buckets of poisonous spiders while cackling demons laugh maniacally at your torment and poke you with pointy sticks. Seriously, it will suck. Those Greeks don't fuck around.
The music for today is "Oh Yeah", by The Subways. They're apparently pretty big in the UK, and I think they've played on Conan and Letterman a few times. Once again, the sound is just good wave-your-hands, shout-out-loud, rock/punk/whatever the kids are calling it these days. Oh, and the bass player is wicked rocker-chick hot, which is also a plus. I actually like their song "Mary" a little better, but the video they have for it is crappy. Enjoy.
I also think that they were on an episode of the "O.C." once, and it's sad that I'm actually embarrassed to type that. As I've said before, I really do hate the Catch-22 of seeing a band that I like play on a show that I despise; I mean, it's good exposure, why aren't I happy for them? For example, the other night Noel strapped me to the sofa and forced me to endure an episode of “The Hills” on MTV, no matter how loudly I screamed, and I was genuinely distressed when a Tokyo Police Club song started playing during one of the sweeping helicopter panoramas of downtown L.A. that seem to comprise 50% of the show’s running time. Does this make me a shitty fan, more concerned with their (and by association my) image rather than their success? Probably, but I'm comfortable with my elitism.
To go off on a brief tangent here (because I seem to be incapable of just writing anything short), I fucking hate “The Hills”. Like, with a passion that burns from within hotter than thousands of volcanoes filled with tiny suns and illegal Mexican fireworks. It’s awful. I can understand the original mentality that the producers must have had when pitching it; I mean, on paper, a show that’s basically about a bunch of true-life rich hot people and their glamorous lifestyles sounds fucking brilliant. But in reality, it turns out that their vapid lives really aren’t that interesting and so they’re forcibly thrown into improbably scripted situations, at which point all that’s left is the plot of a bad 90210 episode filled with people who can’t act and have less on-screen personality than a bag of especially boring and possibly retarded rocks. And that one kid, Spencer or Trevor or whatever the fuck his name is? He’s easily the most annoying person in the entire history of the world. I guess the producers realized that their glimpse into Hollywood’s fabulous teenage underground wasn’t enough to keep people invested in the show, so they decided to do their best to enrage viewers instead of enchanting them by inserting obnoxiously douchey guy characters to hate, but still. He beyond sucks. Every time he opens his mouth I just want to smash his enormous teeth through the back of his skull with whatever blunt object is nearby. So good for you, MTV. You’ve made me feel something, even if it’s homicidal bloodlust instead of delight, and isn’t that what good television is all about?
Moving on to other me-related news that doesn’t involve my hatred of crappy reality shows, I got accepted to portfolio school and will be starting classes next week. This is exciting, because I’m really looking forward to learning about advertising and think that it’s something I’ll really like; and terrifying, because I haven’t been to school in like five years and will be working full time until I graduate. I’m going to try and keep up the blog as much as I can, but we’ll see how feasible that will actually be. Oh, and if anyone has a decent Mac laptop or knows where I can get one for a price that’s not an equivalent value to a mid-sized luxury sedan, please let me know. I don’t actually need it for school, per se; but I’m told that if I don’t have one all of the other kids will laugh and call me names before beating me up and stealing my juicebox. It’ll be high school all over again.
1 comment:
subways are middies
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